Power Isn’t Just for Politicians—It’s for You Too
When you hear the phrase “person in power,” who comes to mind? Maybe a politician, a CEO, or a judge. Maybe it’s the owner of a sports franchise or a billionaire with influence over entire industries.
But let me guess: you didn’t come to mind, did you?
No surprise there. We’ve been conditioned to think of power in a very specific way, and it usually involves someone with a significant amount of authority and influence over others, whether positive or negative. Those with titles before their names, in government, on our screens, at news conferences, on the ballot, calling the shots, making headlines, standing at podiums and on stages. Meanwhile, we—the ones offstage and out of the headlines—can be left feeling frustrated and helpless as we bear witness to people whose use of power has real-life consequences in our life and in the lives of those we love.
It’s worth recognizing that there are, in fact, things that are simply beyond our control in life, and that’s okay. We can’t single-handedly change laws overnight. We don’t get a direct vote on every decision that impacts our lives. Some things are just out of our hands.
But not everything.
We don’t have to succumb to a state of helplessness and powerlessness forever. To cope with these feelings, it’s important to understand the use and misuse of power, its effects, and ultimately, finding a way to connect to our own.
Recognize and Acknowledge the Impact of Misused Power
Sometimes power isn’t always used wisely. People with poor intentions can wield their power irresponsibility, misuse it and even abuse it. A leader with good intentions can even exert their power in ways that end up having adverse effects for those they serve.
What about you? Are you living with the effects of choices made by people who have used their power in unhelpful or harmful ways? Do you feel the weight of policies, poor treatment, leadership decisions, or circumstances beyond your control? Maybe it’s affecting your family, your future, your community or your peace of mind. It’s okay to feel frustrated, discouraged and even angry. It’s important to acknowledge those feelings and express those feelings with people you trust. Because what’s happening in the world and in your life matters.
When Power Loses Perspective
Sometimes when people rise to positions of power, they can become disconnected from the real, everyday lives of the very people they serve. People can start to be seen as statistics rather than souls. Pain becomes politicized instead of being met with presence and compassion. Policies get drafted, numbers get crunched, decisions get made, and somewhere along the way, humanity gets lost. Compassion, empathy and kindness go missing. The heart is taken out of the heart of the matter, and all that’s left is…well, the matter.
But that’s not the whole story.
And this is the part where you get to come in. And your power, too.
Empowerment Starts With You
We’ve all heard it said: “With great power comes great responsibility.” But what if we have a great responsibility to use our great power?
If we have a very limited view in the way we define power, it’s easy to assume we have none. But that’s simply not true. Just because someone else has a ‘different’ kind of power doesn’t mean you don’t have any or that it’s any less meaningful or impactful.
For example, we underestimate the power that small acts of kindness can have, especially during difficult times. They aren’t the kind of gestures that will grab headlines or get much attention, but they do have an impact on people as they feel acknowledged, cared for and valued. There’s a “ripple effect” as they inspire people to pay forward the very kindness that was shown to them.
Are acts of kindness the type of power that leads to economic growth, healthcare advancements and new laws? Probably not. But who’s to say it’s any less meaningful; albeit on a smaller scale, but no smaller in validity.
Let me ask you: is there not power in the empathy you show to a neighbor who is hurting as a result of the power exerted by another? Someone who sees a friend’s pain and goes towards it instead of away from it. Someone who offers their presence to a person who has felt unseen and unheard. A type of empathy and compassion that’s transformative to someone—the kind that provides comfort, warms their heart, makes them feel less alone, provides a bit more hope and a little more light for them to see at the end of the tunnel. The kind of gentleness and grace that encourages a person to keep going and not give up.
If that’s not power, I don’t know what is.
Transforming How We Define and Use Power
What if power is not just political influence, but the influence we have in our community and those around us? What if it’s not just in the policies we didn’t choose, but in the way we respond to them? What if true, transformative power isn’t the sound of grandiose speeches made to crowds of people, but in the soft whisper we speak to one person’s heart?
Not leading by force, but by example.
Not in authority, but being the author of your story and making a difference in someone else’s.
Not just walking into certain rooms, but walking into your calling and alongside others.
Not being in the spotlight, but being a light to others.
You Get the Final Say
While you may not be the leader of the free world, a CEO, or a judge, you are the leader of your life. You decide what direction you go in and the things you stand for. You get to determine who you are, how you use your voice, talents, the impact you make and the legacy you’ll leave. When we put our focus and energy on those things, that’s where we will find our power.
That energy that you’ll be filled with…is what true power feels like.
The difference that someone else experiences as a result of your empowerment…is what real power looks like.
Let’s feel it. Let’s see it. And most importantly, let’s use it.
Because what the world needs is not more people with power over others. But the power from within that’s used for others.
Reaching Out for Support
If you’re struggling with feelings of powerlessness, helplessness or hopelessness, you’re not alone, even if it feels like you are. We encourage you to reach out to Tobin Counseling Group for a free consultation. We are here to support you and to help you find your way again. There is strength in numbers, and we would be honored to support you in finding yours.
And the next time someone references a person in power, remember…that person can be you, too.